Father: Nguyen Dinh Phuc
Mother: Nguyen Thi Ngoc
Baby: Nguyen Lan Chi (May 30, 2018)
“Miracles” are said to be something too far away and out of reach of hundreds of “infertile” couples. However, it’s not true. If we find it earlier, find in the right place with the help of the right people, miracles will come to us.
Today, when I write these confessions about my journey to find my baby, I would like to send a thousand thanks and the sincerest gratitude to the medical team of AF Hanoi Hospital at first. They are the ones who brought miracles to my family 3 years ago.
Everyone who has been on the journey to find a child because of infertility would surely understand that this journey is not easy at all. We have to go through grief, hardship, and pressure. Getting married at the age of 25, like any other couples, we want to have babies. However, life is not like what we often dream of. Time flew. One year had passed but we did not have baby. We could do nothing but keep waiting for 2 years more. The anxiety increased day by day, but I didn’t dare to think that I had too much difficulty in having children because both of us were young and healthy. But, with the urging of the families, brothers, aunts and uncles, we had months of “terrible psychological torment”.
When seeing children of neighborhood running in and out, calling mom and dad, I burst into tears and turned my face away so that no one could see. I always tormented myself and wondered I was also a woman, why I could not become a mother like others. Since then, I had boiled up the will to find a child. We began to roam everywhere to find doctors. We kept listening to see if there was any good doctor or good medicine. We tried both herb medicines, traditional medicines, and western one but having not examined to find the root of the problem. We just assumed that we were infertile.
5 years is not a long time compared to the time many other couples had to spend to find baby. However, at that time, in a poor countryside of the sunny and windy land in Ha Tinh, such time was too terribly long and painful. Those days, we were the only infertile couple in the hamlet. Wherever we went to, people all commented. Indeed, I had lived in the months of metal crisis and physical breakdown when my friends of the same age all had children. I had a feeling that everything was turning against me. Life was heavy and gloomy when I had the reputation of being “infertility”. I was so sorry for me and feel empty in my heart.
For the last 5 years, I have been happy whenever I missed my period. I hoped, became disappointed and then had hope repeatedly. My savings gradually run out, so did my youth. However, I got nothing, just pain and despair. I thought that everything had been arranged, I could not expect what I do not have. We comforted each other to adopt a kid when we have enough conditions.
However, life is not easy when I had to live in the derision and contempt of everyone. I had to receive the irony from my husband’s family, accepting the harsh reputation of a cruel women. I used to think that I would give up and let go of my husband so that he could find a new person. I wanted him to have a happy and harmonious life. In the most desperate moment of my life, when I did not know what to do to continue living, I accidentally read a fan page sharing about infertility of AF Hanoi Hospital. I didn’t understand why at that time, my will to find a child rose up strongly in me once again. I told my husband that I was wrong right from the beginning when we started to find babies. My husband and I looked forward to the day of late of the period to go to Hanoi once.
That day finally came. We got on a coach to go to Hanoi. At the station, when we mentioned AF Hanoi Hospital, the drive said he knew it. At 4:00 am, we presented at the hospital’s gate. We nervously waited for the morning. We sat on the bench and waited, not daring to leave, just waiting for our turn. When it was my turn, I entered the room and shivered. After examining for both of us, at 11:30, the doctor called us to enter the room. The results showed that we could not naturally have babies and need to take IVF. Coming here, we followed the instructions of doctors. We, without any moments of hesitation, put all of our faith and hope in the hospital and made the application immediately.
I didn’t know why I had a strong belief in this IVF journey to find babies. My baby was waiting and calling for me, I thought so. The new journey started once more time. I had my eggs simulated right on that day. The distance from Ha Tinh to Hanoi of 400 km long seemed shorter. I went back and forth. I did not feel tired nor difficult when I believed that the path to find my child was gradually shortened. The destination I have been forwarding in the past 5 years was probably near. I felt nothing even when the needles coming into my body. Although I took this journey mostly alone, getting on the coach at midnight and getting off at more than 3am, I was still happy for thinking that my child was waiting for me. At the hospital, I felt so warm and comfortable. When the door was opened, there were the affectionate eyes, dear smiles, attentive care of the hospital’s medical staff, and the shared sympathy of the patients – who were completely strange but suddenly close. I still called such place my home and the second family of my daughter and me. People there are all my daughter’s moms.
All took place smoothly like that, and then the day of poking eggs to create embryos finally came. The most nervous was the day when I heard the embryo results because I didn’t have many eggs and my husband was so weak. But all was beyond our expectations, I found very satisfied with myself. Since then, I dare to affirm to everyone that I have put my faith in the right place. The path I was on is the right one. Nor can I think and imagine that I will get pregnant at the first embryo transfer. But it’s actually true. I had 2 line-pregnancy test strip right after 9 days of embryo transfer. The beta results were not bad. I succeeded and the miracle had come. I didn’t know whether it was a dream or the reality. The perseverance and determination of myself, along with the talent and enthusiasm of the doctors, have allowed me to witness the miracle coming to me right away. That feeling still haunts me now.
After 5 years, I have been able to be myself. I have experienced the feeling of walking quietly, speaking softly, smiling gracefully. Everything went so well even though the first 3 months of pregnancy I felt like I wanted to die again and again. I couldn’t eat or drink anything, even drinking water made my face turn pale. But I was very happy, very happy, just looking forward to the regular antenatal check-up to see the sprouts growing in the body, to hear the baby’s heartbeat. Just like that, my baby grew up healthy like a warrior.
We finally met on the last day of May, the moment we entered a hot summer. Hearing the baby cry at birth, I cried, but in happiness. The feeling of skin-to-skin on the mother’s chest was so sacred. It’s only been 3 years since you’ve been present in this life. Until now and forever, I will always be proud to talk about that journey, always proud to talk about my second home AF HANOI, about the people there who created “miracles” for life. They have helped me to erase all my pain, regret, and despair so that I can have complete happiness with the laughter of my child today.
All difficulties and sufferings have now passed, only happiness and smiles remain. Therefore, through this program, I want to send to infertile couples who are on the way to find love that you should believe in medicine. You must have a clear examination to determine the cause and make the right decisions and choices so that the opportunity to become a parent comes earlier. As for those who have been, are and will fulfill their dream of becoming a parent at Hanoi Nam Hoc and Infertility Hospital, please put your trust in the hospital, trust the people there, trust the efforts and enthusiasm of the hospital’s medical team for the success that the hospital has achieved during its formation and development. Please put your faith in victory with the hospital because for me, it is a place to incubate happiness. Give the Hospital your great faith, they will give you the opportunity to do the highest vocation of your life. Just have faith, perseverance and determination, miracles will come to us. If you fail a few times along the way, think that “miracles” also take time.